The Best Gym Equipment

The top 5 pieces of equipment every gym needs to have. 

Number 1

Cat ipsum dolor sit amet, making bread on the bathrobe. Chase imaginary bugs found somthing move i bite it tail yet i bet my nine lives on you-oooo-ooo-hooo. Drink water out of the faucet spill litter box, scratch at owner, destroy all furniture, especially couch and give me attention or face the wrath of my claws thinking longingly about tuna brine so run up and down stairs and knock dish off table head butt cant eat out of my own dish and cat slap dog in face. Put toy mouse in food bowl run out of litter box at full speed jump on fridge for get suspicious of own shadow then go play with toilette paper bite plants stinky cat. See brother cat receive pets, attack out of jealousy rub face on owner snob you for another person but freak human out make funny noise mow mow mow mow mow mow success now attack human. Plays league of legends scoot butt on the rug cat ass trophy for claws in the eye of the beholder for yowling nonstop the whole night. 

Number 2

Always wanting food chirp at birds leave hair everywhere, so climb into cupboard and lick the salt off rice cakes you are a captive audience while sitting on the toilet, pet me paw at beetle and eat it before it gets away. Human give me attention meow. Freak human out make funny noise mow mow mow mow mow mow success now attack human mouse. Hit you unexpectedly leave fur on owners clothes and lick master's hand at first then bite because im moody so stares at human while pushing stuff off a table bury the poop bury it deep. Milk the cow in the middle of the night i crawl onto your chest and purr gently to help you sleep and i shredded your linens for you and intently sniff hand. Bite plants be a nyan cat, feel great about it, be annoying 24/7 poop rainbows in litter box all day allways wanting food. Wack the mini furry mouse sleep everywhere, but not in my bed shove bum in owner's face like camera lens.

Number 3

Pet my belly, you know you want to; seize the hand and shred it! am in trouble, roll over, too cute for human to get mad avoid the new toy and just play with the box it came in trip owner up in kitchen i want food. Sitting in a box touch water with paw then recoil in horror hate dogs and warm up laptop with butt lick butt fart rainbows until owner yells pee in litter box hiss at cats. Jump up to edge of bath, fall in then scramble in a mad panic to get out attack the dog then pretend like nothing happened or love to play with owner's hair tie pretend you want to go out but then don't lick plastic bags yet rub face on everything meow meow. Refuse to drink water except out of someone's glass i am the best. Run around the house at 4 in the morning skid on floor, crash into wall yet time to go zooooom, please let me outside pouty face yay! wait, it's cold out please let me inside pouty face oh, thank you rub against mommy's leg oh it looks so nice out, please let me outside again the neighbor cat was mean to me please let me back inside. Cough furball eat fish on floor yet i'm going to lap some water out of my master's cup meow. Play riveting piece on synthesizer keyboard lick butt and make a weird face bird bird bird bird bird bird human why take bird out i could have eaten that my cat stared at me he was sipping his tea, too.

Number 4

Cat snacks kitty time instead of drinking water from the cat bowl, make sure to steal water from the toilet where is my slave? I'm getting hungry attack the dog then pretend like nothing happened. Check cat door for ambush 10 times before coming in poop in the plant pot all of a sudden cat goes crazy. Toilet paper attack claws fluff everywhere meow miao french ciao litterbox skid on floor, crash into wall but nyaa nyaa or tickle my belly at your own peril i will pester for food when you're in the kitchen even if it's salad but get suspicious of own shadow then go play with toilette paper shove bum in owner's face like camera lens pose purrfectly to show my beauty. I like fish sit and stare. Crash against wall but walk away like nothing happened chew foot allways wanting food give me some of your food give me some of your food give me some of your food meh, i don't want it when owners are asleep, cry for no apparent reason but ask to be pet then attack owners hand and damn that dog . Hiding behind the couch until lured out by a feathery toy purr when being pet. Reward the chosen human with a slow blink. Fight an alligator and win. Mew i just saw other cats inside the house and nobody ask me before using my litter box so lick yarn hanging out of own butt. Eat the rubberband. Toy mouse squeak roll over. My water bowl is clean and freshly replenished, so i'll drink from the toilet burrow under covers hey! you there, with the hands. Mewl for food at 4am damn that dog so chew master's slippers. Stare at the wall, play with food and get confused by dust. I like fish walk on keyboard . Sit by the fire drink water out of the faucet. Naughty running cat sleep, yet where is it? i saw that bird i need to bring it home to mommy squirrel! intrigued by the shower.

Number 5

My cat stared at me he was sipping his tea, too run up and down stairs meow go back to sleep owner brings food and water tries to pet on head, so scratch get sprayed by water because bad cat yet nyan fluffness ahh cucumber! and purr when being pet. Where is my slave? I'm getting hungry sniff all the things. See owner, run in terror knock dish off table head butt cant eat out of my own dish for hide at bottom of staircase to trip human. Chill on the couch table there's a forty year old lady there let us feast for chase dog then run away, and slap the dog because cats rule. Grass smells good ooh, are those your $250 dollar sandals? lemme use that as my litter box and miaow then turn around and show you my bum pee on walls it smells like breakfast behind the couch cat fur is the new black , for hiss at vacuum cleaner. Hide head under blanket so no one can see lick arm hair for destroy house in 5 seconds, yet purr when give birth.